Best chain letter

Hello, I suffer from the guilt of not forwarding 50 Billion chain letters sent to me by people who actually believe that if you send them on, a poor 6-year-old girl in Arkansas with a breast on her forehead will be able to raise enough money to have it removed before her redneck parents sell her to a traveling freak show.

Do you honestly believe that Bill Gates is going to give you, and everyone to whom you send "his" email, $1000?
How stupid are we?

"Ooooh, looky here! If I scroll down this page and make a wish, I'll get laid by a model I just happen to run into the next day!"
What a bunch of bullSHOD !

Maybe the evil chain letter leprechauns will come into my house and sodomize me in my sleep for not continuing a chain letter that was started by Peter in 5 AD and brought to this country by midget pilgrims on the Mayflower.

If you're going to forward something, at least send me something mildly amusing. I've seen all the "send this to 10 of your closest friends, and this poor, wretched excuse for a human being will somehow receive a nickel from some omniscient being" forwards about 90 times. [Ditto musical emails with pictures of kittens and/or puppies -- ed.]
I don't care !

Show a little intelligence and think about what you're actually contributing to by sending out these forwards. Chances are, it's our own unpopularity.

The point being? If you get some chain letter that's threatening to leave you shagless or luckless for the rest of your life, delete it. If it's funny, send it on.

Don't piss people off by making them feel guilty about a leper in Botswana with no teeth who has been tied to the a** of a dead elephant for 27 years and whose only salvation is the 5 cents per letter he'll receive if you forward this email.

Now forward this to everyone you know.Otherwise, tomorrow morning your underwear will turn carnivorous and will consume your genitals.

Have a nice day.
P.S. Send me 15 bucks

15 Reasons To Allow Drinking On The Job ...

1. It's an incentive to show up.
2. It reduces stress.
3. It leads to more honest communications.
4. It reduces complaints about low pay.
5. It cuts down on time off because you can work with a hangover.
6. Employees tell management what they think, not what management wants to hear.
7. It helps save on heating costs in the winter.
8. It encourages carpooling.
9. Increases job satisfaction because if you have a bad job you don't care.
10. It eliminates vacations because people would rather come to work.
11. It makes fellow employees look better.
12. It makes the cafeteria food taste better.
13. Bosses are more likely to hand out raises when they have had a couple of drinks.
14. Salary negotiations are a lot more profitable.
15. It makes people love their cubicle. -via IHMC

2006 - Vrede: Wakeboarding , CKY– send it

This recipy is a surefire hit for any barmy collective .Good times like the good old days - Blended too perfection !

Ingredients for - "Daar is min van ons oor" - not many of us left:

3 x good mates (Clint – AKA Ondier, JJ AKA Greek connection and Elbow macaroni)
1 x 150ml SPF 30 sunscreen
1 x digital camera
1 x 750ml Johny Walker Black
1 x Case of Heineken
1 x 750ml Spice Gold
1 x 750ml Smirnoff Vodka
6 x 340ml Appetizers / Grapetizers
1 x 2L Sprite
1 x 2L Coke
1 x Half jack Richelue
1 x O’Brien Wakeboard
1 x 500ml binding lube
1 x Vrede Dam
Plenty x Good Beatz
4 x Grumpy freaked out neighbors

Day 1 :
-Preheat the lads from Johannesburg to Vrede @ 30 °C in a Golf Cabriolet – be sure to apply the sunscreen before the journey starts .
-Stop at the first open liquor store to stock up the fluids needed for the big thirst – normally starting 2 km into the journey.
-Don’t stir the ingredients too much; let the essence of the good old days inspire the spirits to rise.
-Sprinkle good beatz from the starting point and allow the ingredients to start bubbling.

On arrival at the dam:
-Cool down the pre baked nutters with a wakeboard session.Return to the base and ensure that the horse power is secured to the jetty.
-Open the fridge and hide stock in odd / difficult to find places – this will be appreciated at a later stage.
-Add more fluids from this point forward ensuring enjoyable ruckus and loud noises – when fluids are mixed be sure too add more than 2 tots per drink and send it regularly.

Plan B:
-When the stock gets low it's time to move to the local bar.While replenishing the liquid levels remember to order 3 X TBones for late night hunger attack to follow.

Helping Hand:
-Order ± 12 tequilas @ the bar to keep emotions happy and the courage high.
-When vision becomes impaired and music changes to Steve Hofmeyer , Smokey , UB40 I'll be 30 , ACE of Base , Theuns Jordaan ,Robbie Wessels or anything close to commercial crap it’s time to head back to the base !

Back at the base :
-Unlock liquor cabinet and mix leftover stock. By this time the hunger will kick in – panfry the TBones.
-4AM :noise will fade and the bosberaad attendees will disappear one by one after discovering odd places to pass out.

Day 2:
-11 AM : wake up with a foul taste in the mouth – very similar to a dog’s blanket. This taste is followed by a degree in dehydration – rehydrate immediately !
-When the rest of the base awakes – notify them that a wakeboard session is the only cure for the hangover.

End result : absolute ruckus + neighbors applauding the nutters from last night for every mad wakeboard pop executed in their after ruckus state !

-Return to the base and start the journey back to civilization – let the good times roll and savor the last moments !

2007 - Falsebay : View from Steenbras Station

Steenbras dam is located between the Hottentots Holland mountain range and KogelBerg , just above Gordonsbay.The Steenbras water station is positioned at the top of the mountain and is close to my house.

I take a drive up to the Station once in a while; especially when it's a spectacular day. The view of FalseBay from this viewpoint is breathtaking.

2006 – Strand : Beach and Sunsets

The Strand - Afrikaans for Beach is a great beach for swimming - rated as one of the safest places to swim in South Africa.

It's just around the corner and I often go and cool down until the sun sets. The beach can get extremely busy in and out of season and the upcountry folks normally take over when they arive.Here are a couple of photos of the sunsets and a warm day on the beach - 40°C.

Dodge the pothole....

2006 - Meirings Poort : Jewel of the Klein Karoo

My grandmother told me about a place called Meirings Poort in the Klein Karoo .It is situated close to Prins Albert and forms part of the Swartberg Pass.I felt like treating my grandmother so we drove there. It really revived her memories – the last time that she saw Meirings Poort was in 1950 - a dirt road back then.

The road is surrounded by soaring cliffs formed out of spectacular rock formations. The Meirings Poort route winds for 25km along the base of a gorge and crosses the Groot River 25 times.

The waterfall is a great stop but we couldn't enjoy the full splendor of it due to the dry season.

2006 - Franschhoek : Wemmershoek

We had to wait for 6 months before we could do the Wemmershoek hike in Franschhoek.An estimated total of 20,000 HA ecologically sensitive Fynbos burnt in December 2005.The Wemmershoek burnt area estimated at 11,800 HA.

After 6 months the impact of the fire was still visible ,luckily most of the vegetation recovered quickly.The Wemmershoek hiking trail is a winner, here’s a couple of photos taken during the hike.